Moving On

Moving on
We are moving out of our house this weekend. Am I sad? Yes, coz it means having to say goodbye to the space I learned to love, the place where I cooked my “experimental dishes” to the delight of my roommates, and the place where everyone is free to move around. Am I happy? Yes, coz it means living in a new (cleaner) house, having no “contract” to think about and not feeling guilty when I have to move away (meaning, I won’t burden my roommates with the huge rental expense). From six beautiful ladies sharing a house (and the responsibilities that goes with it), we are now down to three. But for how long???

Moving
My application is now moving! THE email came last Tuesday. I need to undergo a physical examination soon. I hope the Doc will give me a clean bill of health so that I can move on with my application.

Moving???
Just today, I came across the lyrics of Gabrielle’s Out of Reach. How fitting some lines of this song to my current state of mind.

"Out Of Reach"

Knew the signs
Wasn't right
I was stupid for a while
Swept away by you
And now I feel like a fool
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be
Catch myself
From despair
I could drown
If I stay here
Keeping busy everyday
I know I will be OK
But I was
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be
So much hurt,
So much pain
Takes a while
To regain
What is lost inside
And I hope that in time,
You'll be out of my mind
And I'll be over you
But now I'm
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach,
So far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be
Out of reach,
So far
You never gave your heart
In my reach, I can see
There's a life out there

For me

And finally, not anymore related to Moving
It takes 14 muscles to smile and 43 to frown. But what about hugs, how many muscles do you need to flex your arms and envelope someone with it? Surely, not that much to cause you muscle pains after, right?

A friend of mine has a “daily hugging habit”. She makes it a point to hug 20 people everyday and it never fails to brighten up a gloomy day.

What I love about hugs is that it makes me feel secure and eases the worry, fear and all the negative feelings I have.

Oh crap, I need a hug today.

My New Glasses

Finally, I got my new glasses! After weeks of searching the perfect glasses for my face, I finally found THE one.


I know this is so “kikay”! But what the heck! I look good with it and it brightens my face. Downside is, its not meant for daily use (since I need to match it with my office clothes, you know).

Well, I still have my old but reliable rimless (and serious looking) glasses.



But if worse comes to worst, I can still wear my disposable contact lenses (hmm… can I buy one in pink shade???)...

Goodbye

My housemate-college buddy-groupmate bade me goodbye this morning before dragging her two big luggages inside the cab for the airport. As of writing (around11 am), she’ll probably be in Japan, trying hard not to fall asleep (since she didn’t sleep last night due to last minute packing) so as not to miss her connecting flight to Detroit (before catching yet another plane to her final destination – San Jose California).

It was a short goodbye; no tears were shed. Maybe it has not sunk in yet, or maybe we just don’t want to see each other crying.

Am I sad? Definitely. Joy’s leaving means no one's gonna tell me to use my head when I'm falling inlove with @$$h0**$; no one to join me watch Friends and laugh and laugh again even if we watch it over and over again; no one to share my excitement with; no one to borrow chick lit from. The list could go on and on.

What makes her departure doubly sad is that we need to move out from our apartment as well. We (X, Bam and I) cannot afford the monthly rental of our house anymore. :( It's another change from a big, roomy apartment to a small, kinda crowded condo.

I hope and pray that:
... she made it to her connecting flight (without hassle)
... her luggage is not that heavy
...Jong will pick her up in San jose and help her with her luggages
...she will like it in San Jose
...she will not miss home that much
...she will not let anyone bully her
...she will survive!!!

Joy, sail away! Fly High! Good Luck! God Bless! and see you soon. :-)

Happy/Sad

Its 3:29 am and I have not been that productive the whole day. Yes, I have submitted the month end requirements from HR, answered a few emails, updated some reports but these are not really substantial “work” for me. Well, I have an excuse --- today is not your usual Monday since today is the first day of the month. For us accounting geeks, first day (or first week for that matter) means closing time! And since I have until tomorrow to book all entries, most of us are in the waiting game now (excuses! excuses!).

Oh well, I can’t imagine what tomorrow will bring, when everyone is at home and I am stuck in the office working!!! Screw those closing deadlines!!!

Waiting
Oh boy was I happy today! My bestfriend finally got his Letter from the Post, and guess what, his assessment is POSITIVE, yipeee!!! Now, he can actually move on and start a new phase of waiting (but this time around its waiting with excitement for a promising future). 2007 here we come!!!

My dear Wombat, don’t you think SweeBee was doubly happy when she got to finalized your papers? Me think she sped up the process so you won’t badger her any longer (joke). :-)

Emotions
I am sad… last night when you put down the phone before I said my goodbyes;
I was hurt... when you said IT would make me happy;
I am mad… because you decided to sleep without saying you’re sorry.

When I had the best intention, it was also when you turned me down.
Are you trying to piss me off? If yes, then you succeeded. My Congratulations.

Lesson learned: Di na ulit ako tatawag. Di na ulit ako mangungumusta. Di na… Di na… Di na Bonnevie… (Ang corny ko!!!)

Friends Again
I can’t be mad at you forever. I just hope that you won’t try to do the I’ll-try-to-get-some-sleep-first-and-settle-with-you-in-the-morning attitude again coz I don’t want to sleep with a heavy heart. I hope you feel the same way too.



Would you believe I finished this entry after an hour? Its 4:53 am and I’m still bored. Whatever!

antok ako :(

I only had 3 hours of sleep today.

My mom arrived from the province and I had to fetch her at the airport. She’s attending a seminar in Tagaytay tomorrow. Since she and her co-teacher don’t have plans for the day, I decided to bring them to Mall of Asia, my first time to be there actually.

At around 3:00 pm, I decided to go home and catch some sleep since I’ll be on graveyard shift today. I left my Mom at SM since she is still busy trying on some clothes.

I need to be at the office for our bi-weekly meeting so my sleep was cut short. And now I am feeling sleepy, been yawning several times now. The stillness of the place, devoid of chatters and laughter of the Team, is lulling me to sleep.

Its 3:56 am --- 2 hours and 4 minutes before I’ll rush to the exit door, sign out from the guard, walk as fast as I can to the bus stop (or is it jeepney stop/ tricycle stop?) so that I’ll be home at 6:05, hit the sack and sleep.

But before that, I still have some emails to send, websites to browse and blogs to update. :-)

untitled

A lot of things happened today, some may react to it negatively while others will be more open and optimistic about the impending changes. I am not yet sure how to react but I know this is a win-win situation for everyone. I want to be an optimist... I want to view this positively. I will post more of this later...

On a ligter side, my very good (best) friend sent me the lyrics of the song If You're Not the One and I was really touched... I do hope he understands why di pa talaga pwede...

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?

If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?

If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call?

If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all?

I never know what the future brings

But I know you are here with me now

We'll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don't wannna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?

If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?

If you're not for me then why does this distance maime my life?

If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don't know why you're so far away

But I know that this much is true

We'll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with

And I wish that you could be the one I die with

And Im praying you're the one I build my home with

I hope I love you all my life

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away

And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today

'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right

And though I can't be with you tonight

You know my heart is by your side

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...................